Current location:	gorham 331
Current mood:	everything bagel.
Current music:	top chef
Entry tags:	life, mike

i feel the need to type.
the best feeling in the entire world is knowing i got all my shit done that i needed to.  i had sooooo much due today and to get done tonight, and i did.  not to mention i just cleaned my half of the room which always makes me feel good.


the worst feeling in the world is knowing that you are so close but something seems to be slipping away.  i dont know what happened.  he is busy all day with work things, and im usually busy every night with either homework/art projects, or making bonds with people here.  i feel so bad for not calling him or falling asleep or just being busy....but fuck.  i finally feel like i found myself at this place.  and i wont give it up.  i just dont know why he is slipping through my fingers.  i love him more than anyone in the entire world.  20 days.  20 days til i can have that feeling that i need....right now.  this will be the longest we've gone without seeing each other since he moved to FL, and i think its wearing us both out.  we just need to hold on for 20 days, and all this yelling at each other will stop because the only reason we hate each other is because of the distance.  and now that i delayed my move to FL til fall '09, he is fed up with me even more.  i'm fed up with myself too.  but im glad i went through this process of hating my life cause now i will appreciate that one moment even more.


not crying is the hardest thing about college.  above the being alone thing, above the roommate drama, above anything else.  even if you do cry, its nothing like being able to be by yourself and do it.  its such an emotional release that i need right now.

i really enjoy art class.  i lie and say how much i hate it, how much of a pain in the ass it is, how long is it, etc.  but im lying.  2 hours and 45 minutes feels like half an hour.  i love the group of girls i sit with.  we all just click and its amazing.  i love re-drawing an extremely detailed collage twice onto canvas board then painting it according to a grey scale and any other color i pick.  and for once people actually tell me how good i am at it, which i love.  i really enjoy doing it.  too bad there really isnt anything to do with that as a major though.

i also really enjoy communications.  im really not trying to be cocky, but i do so well on everything.  and its so refreshing knowing that im trying and working and its paying off.  everything we have learned is so interesting to me.  i'm seriously considering transferring to that major.


and to add to my going-good night, top chef is on :)


i need to wash my face,
je